Welcoming 2016 - Thank you for your support in 2015

2015 has allowed me to thrive and am so grateful for the awesome opportunities to excel doing what I love. I received great press coverage including a number of print media thanks to Courier Mail Q Weekend, Brisbane News Magazine, Sunday Mail, online talk shows A_to_A_talk_show and Entrepreneurs of Africa, Our Definition of Success Podcast, radio broadcast inc Canberra's 1Way FM and internationally with Botswana Gabz Fm show called The Link with Jessica.

I had incredible partnerships and collaborative work including with organisations such s QPAC and Friends of Heal Foundation, African Women Group in Sydney, Maurice Blackburn Lawyers, AFL QLD, and many others. I continued to mentor a number of young people, continued my roles in advisory boards and management committees and advocacy on issues of mental health, domestic violence, service access etc. I also continued my public training in Mental Health First Aid increasing community awareness and literacy on mental health issues. 

Although I thrived, my greatest struggle has been my recovery from back surgery as a result of car accident sustained in 2014 which has been very slow, painful and impacted greatly on my ability to do more of the things I love. However I am forever grateful for my family and friends for holding my hand through it all and making sure I come out of it all although bruised but stronger. 

One other sad event in 2015 is saying goodbye to my work with Mental Health in Multicultural Australia (MHiMA) project. Four yrs ago I was employed to establish this national project to provide a national focus for advice and support to providers and governments of issues of mental health and suicide prevention for people from culturally and linguistically diverse backgrounds.  It has been a great privilege and an honour to have worked in this project. I am sure those taking on after us will do justice to the awesome work our team did across Australia. The project is currently under review and recommendations will be made to the government in March about its future inline with the new reforms. I am proud of many achievements of the project but most importantly the development and implementation of the Framework for Mental health in Multicultural Australia a tool that increases cultural responsiveness of mental health services. I hope this will continue.

I look forward to your support and partnerships again 2016!

See my video message here

Thank you

The Survival Spirit : I am a Breast Cancer Survivor - By B.K.S Orapeleng

October is Australia’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month, which provides an opportunity for us all to focus on breast cancer and its impact on those affected by the disease in our community. Like many families around the world, breast cancer has impacted my family. 

It was in October 2010 when I received the horrible news that no daughter should receive. It was about my mother Betty’s diagnosis of breast cancer. This diagnosis came as a huge blow to my mother who was at that time supporting her sister Mmeisi through her recent diagnosis of breast cancer. My mother is a pillar of strength in our family and to witness and to experience her pain and despair throughout her recovery journey from a breast cancer diagnosis has been both inspirational and heart breaking.

In March 2013 we experienced a terrible loss of Mmeisi, my mother’s sister. I was there in the last week of her life, I held her hand, I experienced her pain, I fought with her and  for her but in the end, the battle with cancer was lost. She was a mother of five, with the youngest only five years old. A lot can be said about the public health system in Botswana that I believe failed her, that failed us, that failed her children but anger will not bring her back. I now focus my energies in creating awareness of breast cancer and talking about the importance of early detection and treatment and fundraising for breast cancer research. 

As a daughter of a mother who is a breast cancer survivor and a very strong family history of breast cancer, I have been put in the basket of the "high risk" category, which means every 6 months I go through the rigorous breast cancer examination to rule out anything sinister. Every 6 months I sit by the waiting room of the Wesley Breast Cancer Clinic  after all the testing waiting to hear whether I have cancer or not. It is one of the most horrid moments of my life. However, I am grateful to have access to the best health care system here in Australia and  can sleep better at night knowing the rigorous diagnostic process I undertake every 6 months will ensure that if ever anything develops, it will be detected early which increases chances of survival. Above all, having a mother with such a champion heart and strength like no other makes me belief that any health changes that come my way, I will survive it. She continues to pave a way for us and we draw on her "survival spirit".  

As we conclude this breast cancer awareness month of October, I like to share with you in her own words, my mother's "Survival Spirit". May it reach you and inspire you!

The Survival Spirit: I am a Breast Cancer Survivor - By Betty Orapeleng

Having been diagnosed with breast cancer in 2010 was like a hurricane in my life. From the moment I got the news, to the ongoing tests and treatments, it was a whirlwind through the medical system, I was scared, anxious, stressed and insomniac. When the dust settled, I found myself in the middle of limbo land. I tried to get back to the swing of things and move on, well the rest of my life was trying to find a way to a new normal. I needed to figure out what I can do in my everyday life to reduce the risk of ever seeing that cancer again. To look at my life and say “What was going on in my life before my diagnosis that may have played a role in putting me at risk? Was my life full of stress and hurt? Was I overweight? Was I eating all the wrong stuff…… I needed to know what I did that I needed to change because God knows I don’t want this to happen again.

While there likely isn’t one thing that you did to cause the cancer, there are things you can do to live your healthy life moving forward – as a Survivor. Once your doctor tells you that you have breast cancer – you can’t hear anything else…….. a powerful statement – “You have breast cancer” – your life changes with a snap of a finger. When I came to my normal senses, I began to have a unique blend of insight as to how best I could maintain wellness again beyond breast cancer….The Spirit of Survival strengthened. I always knew that healing is God’s will. So I started to say “why this wrestling” then the ceasefire state in my body began to develop. Cancer and I, have established a truce state in my body where we co-exist. I learned new ways of handling predicaments and tribulations, understanding that God may permit problems you are facing in life for the benefit they might bring such as to direct you (Proverbs 20vs 30), inspect you (James 1vs 2-3), correct you (Psalm 119vs 71-72), protect you (Genesis 50vs20), and perfect you (Romans 5vs 3-4).

I was intrigued and inspired by one article from one doctor who compares cancer to weeds as it crowds out good crops and plants. It comes as a result of unhealthy soil that compromised by stress, robbed of nutrients, contaminated by chemicals plus its further strained by negative life style habits. We should be evaluating multiple areas of our lives; quality of sleep, stress factors, food intake, weight and amount of exercise……………the root causes that may have contributed to the development of cancer in each individual.

In view of all these experiences, I looked inside myself for strength, knowing that Greater one lives in me, in every cell of my blood, in every bone of my body and in every fiber of my being. There are always some flat and stormy days, and that is okay…I always say to myself….IT IS WELL WITH MY SOUL. Thanking my strong family support, -  my children, my husband and siblings, as they are a very strong, sound support structure – having people you can talk to, who understand what it is like living with a monster, relieves the burden of feeling alone. Sharing with others in a similar position also helps nip out the thorn that has deepened into your heart, soul and body. Taking responsibility for, and owning your physical and emotional wellbeing is hugely liberating and empowering. With God All things are possible The word of God in Mark 11:22 “ Jesus said to them, Believe in God” AMEN…………

Watch Betty's story here on Youtube: Click Here

Suicide: Dispelling the Myths and Changing the Conversation!

Warning: This blog contains material about suicide which may be triggering to some readers.

“Suicide” is one of the last remaining taboo topics in an age when nothing no longer seem off limits. Not many want to openly talk about it ‘just in case it may put thoughts of suicide in people’s mind’ they may say. However the reality is that suicide touches the lives of many people and has devastating impact on family, friends, colleagues and community. Many people take their own lives every day in Australia and around the world. In 2013, about 6 people died by suicide every day around Australia, that is around 2,500 people who took their own lives. Approximately 75% of those who died by suicide were males and 25% females in 2013. Women are however 4 times more likely to attempt suicide with hospital data for the 2008-2009 financial year indicating that 62% of those who were hospitalised due to self-harm were women.

These statistics are incredibly sobering and highlights the need to break down stigma attached to this taboo subject. Suicide and suicidal ideation is a reality for many people every single day. Just recently on social media (Facebook) I have been witnessing a number of viral posts about suicide, one of them that struck the cord with me is this one below;

“Many people think that a suicide attempt is a selfish move because the person just does not care about the people left behind. I can tell you that when a person gets to that point, they truly believe that their loved ones will be much better off with them gone. This is mental illness not selfishness. TRUTH: Depression is a terrible disease and seems relentless. A lot of us have been close to that edge, or dealt with family members in a crisis, and some have lost friends and loved ones. Let's look out for each other and stop sweeping mental illness under the rug. If I don't see your name, I'll understand. May I ask my family and friends wherever you might be, to kindly copy and paste this status for one hour to give a moment of support to all those who have family problems, health struggles, job issues, worries of any kind and just need to know that someone cares. Do it for all of us, for nobody is immune. Hope to see this on the walls of all my family and friends just for moral support. I know some will!!! I did it for a friend and you can too. You have to copy and paste this one, no sharing. Thank you” (Author Unknown)

I have seen many friends sharing this above statement on their walls.  This highlights the power of social media in breaking down the walls on these sensitive topics such as suicide and mental illness. A very welcomed change! However there are still a number of myths associated with suicide and the discussion around it can quickly get hijacked by those who are misinformed about the topic which can have devastating impact on those bereaved by suicide. The viral post above touches on one of the most common myths associated with suicide which labels victim of suicide as “selfish, not caring etc.” This labeling of the person who has died by suicide as selfish or not caring fails to take to account the fact that research has consistently shown a strong link between suicide and depression, with 90% of the people who die by suicide having an existing mental illness or substance abuse problem at the time of their death.

There are many more myths about suicide, here are some of the most common:

Myth: People who talk about suicide don’t actually do it

Fact: Many people who complete the act of suicide spend considerable time prior to the act, talking about it

Myth: Asking a person who is suicidal whether they are thinking of taking their own life will make them do it

Fact:  By giving the  person who is suicidal permission to discuss their feelings, is often the best opportunity to make them aware that somebody cares about their life and give them hope for life.

Myth: Only certain types of people commit suicide

Fact: Suicidal thoughts and actions can affect anyone from any socio-economic group, religious or racial background or age

Myth: Suicidal people want to die

Fact:   People who are suicidal just want to end the intense emotional and/or physical pain they are experiencing

 This clearly highlights the need for more public awareness about suicide. We need to have the capacity to identify signs of symptoms of a developing mental health issue such as depression and be able to respond to a crisis situation such as someone thinking of suicide. How do you appropriately provide support needed for someone who finds the courage to tell you that they are thinking of taking their own life? How do you give someone hope for life who life has ran them into a rut and they see taking their own lives as the only way to make the hurt stop? How do you support those who are left bereaved by suicide?

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It is important to talk about it so we can understand how to prevent it.

Join us at our next Mental Health First Training on the 6th – 7th November, 2015 in Brisbane as we discuss about what you can do to support someone in a crisis situation such as having suicidal thoughts and behaviours as well as understand the signs and symptoms of common mental health issues and what you can do to help. Help us break the stigma associated with mental health illness so we are able to help ourselves, families, colleagues and community.

This could be one of the most important decisions you may ever undertake, to learn an important life skill that will not only help you, but more importantly someone in need close to you.

Book here

I look forward to seeing you at the training!

If this topic has caused any concerns for you or someone you know, please call the following helplines

Lifeline Australia                         13 11 14

Suicide Call Back Service           1300 659 467

Kids Helpline                               1800 55 1800

MensLine Australia                    1300 78 99 78

Looking for support and advice, call beyond blue - 1300 22 4636

Translating and Interpreting Service (TIS National) - 131 450

Are You a Character Builder or Character Destroyer?

I recently had to confront a very painful past, a past that I thought was so buried safe under layers of self-preservation and sanity, a past that I had chosen to let go, or so I thought! Somehow this person had found a shovel and had begun to dig so deep until exposing the layers and revealing what I thought was a healed wound. Immediately the scab was removed, it left a wound so raw that it felt like it had been bursting to come up in the open for a long time. ‘How dare she?’ like a wounded lion I roared!

You see some things just hurt beyond measure, a pain so deep you feel like you are falling into a bottomless pit. The worst of it all is when you thought you have managed to climb out of the hole then someone takes the liberty to shove you right back in. Human beings are incredibly capable of deep emotions and feelings of empathy, love for one another, courage, peace etc. The emotions that have sustained us for generations and made us evolve into one of the most intelligent species there is. However this capacity has also revealed ability to hurt, to hate, to destroy. Experiencing this dark side of human capacity recently left me completely drained, confused, angry. I was confronted with the questions I had laboured for years throughout my university studies in psychology and behaviour management to answer; Why do people behave the way they do?

You may say to me, being hurt is part of life. But does that mean it is something we have to inflict on others or absorb submissively when it is maliciously directed our way? Something we need to tolerate? I don’t think so. Who gives anyone the right to take away the joyous feelings and peace of another? One thing that was certain about this terrible experience was that it reminded me of my capacity to let the wounds heal and the incredible ability to forgive the hurt of the past. Those who know me well would have heard me using the phrase ‘Turning Wounds into Wisdom’. There is nothing powerful than using the experience of the past and deciding to change your today and your tomorrow. Some things happen to us when we least expect them, it is how we choose to deal with them that determines our character.

The advent of social media has forever changed our lives and the way we engage with others and whilst so many positives have come from this revolution, it has also brought out the very worst in some of us. Gossip and bullying has to an extent always been part of a dark undercurrent of society but nowadays, faceless trolls spew poisonous vitriol to complete strangers and yes sometimes ‘friends’ and colleagues also. All under the cover of anonymity - a sign they have become oblivious it seems to the hurt they cause or perhaps even worse, that they have become ‘disconnected’ from real society and have lost the very essence of humanity – compassion, empathy, friendship, nurturing and supporting.

So today my friends, I ask you this question, are you a character builder or a character destroyer?

Changing Perceptions and Removing the Stigma about Mental Illness

Mental health issues are among the leading causes of disability across the globe. Many people do not associate mental illness with disability however moderate to severe mental health issues can be as disabling as physical disability. Mental health issues do not discriminate, anyone can develop mental illness at some point in their lives. In Australia 1 in 5 people will be diagnosed with a common mental health issue in any given year. The risk factors are wide and varied. The stigma associated with mental illness and the negative and discriminatory attitudes can have devastating impact on the person struggling with the illness. Community awareness about mental health issues is very important to help change perceptions and remove the stigma.

This week (04-10 October, 2015) is the National Mental Health Week held to coincide with World Mental Health Day on 10 October, 2015. These national events are an opportunity to create awareness around mental health and well being and equip people with the right information.

Connect with you local mental health organisations to participate in a number of events planned for this week.

Media is  important in changing perceptions and removing stigma about mental illness. Watch out for ABC TV and radio's Mental As programs during this national mental health week. From comedy, to documentaries, Q and A, and entertainment, ABC is leading to challenge the stigma associated with mental illness and start the conversation. Find out more here.

Mental Health Australia  is running a campaign aimed at acknowledging your role in looking after your own mental health and well being. The 'Mental Health Begins With Me' campaign is about making a mental health promise to yourself then sharing it with your family, friends and colleagues. Visit campaign website here to make your mental health promise.

Lets join together and change perceptions around mental health issues and urge services to appropriately and effectively support people with mental health issues.

If you live in Australia and are you need someone to talk to - call one of the following numbers:

Lifeline - 131 114           beyondblue - 1300 22 4636  Kids Helpline - 1800 55 1800

Suicide Call Back Service -1300 659 467

Translating and Interpretation Service (TIS National) - 131 450